Learning to Dance Ballroom Like the Stars

Have you ever watched the show Dancing with the Stars on ABC and wished you could learn to dance just like they learned to dance? I understand completely as both my wife and I have also wondered and wished this same thing when we watched the show.

Being a man though that is not ordinary I suppose I will admit to not being ashamed to liking, ok let me be honest here, loving to be with out with my wife. Yes that means that being with your wife also can mean dancing and having a wonderful time not just being in a pub shooting pool or whatever else you like to do guys.

I realized that after watching the TV show Dancing with the Stars that is it possible to learn dancing in a better way then just going around trying to dance the way I danced in High School. It wasn't sexy nor pretty those kind of movements, and now at my age it probably isn't that good for me either. Laugh if you may!

Now that brings up another point, the topic of being good for ones health too. I have noticed that this Show Dancing with the Stars also benefits our fitness and body shape. The Stars seem to becoming more and more fit each and every week, their shapes and sizes changing so dramatically, so quickly as I sat there on the couch eating. So who really gave it any thought that dancing The Rhumba, The Samba, The Tango, The Jive, The Waltz, The Cha Cha or The Tango could make exercise such an enjoyable experience and with such huge benefits too. Well I certainly didn't realize it but now I am reaping the benefits.

Guys, lets get back to us, can you see yourself on the dance floor, moving to the beats of Salsa, Samba, Waltz's and even the Tango with other guys in the room looking at you with envy? That is something that can happen to you as it is happening for me as my wife and I playfully learn to dance the Salsa using the Let's Dance Louis DVD Set. After we get this Salsa Dance completed we have 7 other dances to learn. I think we will try learning the Latin Dances first.

Lastly, there are more benefits to this learning to dance opportunity my wife and I have ventured onto and this is the best, absolutely the best thing that happens from ballroom dancing with my wife cheek to cheek. I am pretty sure you have figured it out already, and it is that our relationship has prospered, flourished, back to the point when our time spent together was filled with passion, excitement and laughter.

Now I think that this has been an excellent investment to my future life with my wife if not the best investment of my life.

Jogging in the Snow

Attention joggers: It's okay to take the day off from jogging, if there is a blinding snowstorm going on! Repeat... you don't have to jog during a snowstorm! Jack La Lane, or whatever guru you're following, will forgive you! You're jogging muscles will not turn into bags of K-Y Jelly if you fail to participate one day! The only people who should be jogging in a snowstorm are those in training for the Minsk 5K in mid January, or if you're too dumb to realize what a hazard you are for people trying to drive!

Okay. You caught me. You probably can tell by my first paragraph that I'm a little upset over these overzealous, obnoxiously obsessive runners who feel it necessary to maintain their fitness routine regardless of the weather. Don't get me wrong. I'm all for fitness and jogging is an excellent source of body toning. God bless you men and women out there keeping yourselves fit.

There are, however, a few of your brothers and sisters who must have gotten a 13 on their SAT's, because they're out there, in the worst weather, trying to show their perseverance. Pick up the phone now, don't wait until you finish reading this column, call them and tell them that their lives are in danger.

Let me start at the beginning. Last winter, I had the pleasure of driving to work in a snowstorm that could only be labeled, "The Snowstorm Nobody Wanted." It wasn't a nice, gently falling snow that crunches under your tires when you drive on it. It was a blowing, wet snow mixed with rain, sleet and Campbell's Consommé. Accompanied with a 50 mile per hour wind, which blew the snow sideways, it was like driving through a tunnel of Venetian blinds. The roads were slicker than David Schwimmer's hair. It was a driver's nightmare.

Amidst all this meteorological mayhem, I saw not one, not two, but three people jogging. They weren't jogging on the sidewalk. They were jogging in the street, like they would be les likely to fall if they ran in the street.

One woman was actually jogging in this perilous precipitation with an umbrella. Could someone please explain the rationale behind this? I mean, it was thirty degrees, snow was coming at her sideways like thousands of stickpins, winds gusting up to 50 miles per hour, and here was this woman running while holding an umbrella. What's the umbrella for, lady? Your handicap? Don't you think you'd end up drier if you tried swimming the English Channel?

Another jogger, who had been jogging on the sidewalk, decided he didn't like the side of the street he was jogging on and jumped over the curb, just as I was approaching him. Nice move, Ex-Lax. Here I am, driving on a street of ball bearings, and this single celled amoeba decides to jump in front of me and then he does his Charlie Chaplin imitation of slipping on ice.

Now, I think I'm a pretty courteous guy. (I say, "Excuse me" if I belch and there's no one around.) So, the last thing I want to do is spray cold, wet, dirty snow on someone as they're trying to keep physically fit. However, if a car is coming at me in the opposite direction, I feel it necessary to move to the right, which, of course, causes my car to throw an icy overcoat on any poor pedestrian in the way.

So, from now on, here are the new rules for drivers should they go into a skid:

1. Sit back and enjoy the view. (I didn't know there was a deli in that mini-mall. I must try it as soon as I get out of intensive care.)

2. Aim for the jogger who made you go into the skid in

the first place.

In all fairness, I feel I should issue new rules for the joggers, too. So, here they are. Rules for jogging in a blizzard:

1. Don't.

A blizzard is an excellent day for you to stay home, make a nice cup of diet hot cocoa, play Scrabble with the family and watch a prerecorded video. (Exception: Marathon Man.) And, if you do feel a sudden spark of energy flash through your system, and you absolutely must exercise, then, by all means, come over to my house and shovel my driveway.

The Best Blonde Jokes

Blonde jokes are based on the premise that people (primarily women) with blonde hair are naive, gullible, and...well, just plain stupid. You would think that this simple premise would get old - but lo and behold it does not, the best blonde jokes are alive and well in the 21st century! For some reason, like being attracted to the tabloids at the supermarket checkout counter, I just can't get enough of them, so I present to you the best blonde jokes I know of - and I hope that they make you crack a smile and laugh the rest of the day!

Blonde Joke #1: "Blonde on the lookout"

A redhead was well over the speed limit when she asked her blonde passenger, "See any cops behind us?" The blonde turned around for a long look. "Hey, yeah, I do." "Damn!" said the redhead. "Are his flashers on?" The blonde replied, "Yep, nope. Yep, nope. Yep, nope."

Blonde Joke #2: "First Class to Vegas"

The blonde plopped down in First Class in spite of her Coach ticket. The stewardess informed her, "Miss, you're going to have to move to your seat." But the blonde merely smiled smugly. "Honey, you don't understand: I'm cute, I'm blonde, and when I get to Las Vegas, I'm going to be rich." Even the head stewardess couldn't make her move. "I'm cute, I'm blonde, and when I get to Las Vegas, I'm going to be rich." Finally the Captain was summoned. He whispered in the blonde's ear, she gave him a surprised look, then stood up and moved quietly to Coach. The stewardesses were impressed. "What did you say to get her to leave?" "Oh, I just told her 'First Class doesn't stop in Las Vegas!'"

Blonde Joke #3: "Blonde Diagnosis"

"Doc, you've got to help me," said the cute young redhead. "I hurt all over." "What do you mean?" asked the doctor. She touched her right knee with her finger. "Ow, that hurts." She touched her left cheek. "Ow, that really hurts!" Then she touched her shoulder. "OW! Even THAT hurts!" The doctor grew suspicious. "Are you a natural blonde?" he asked. "Why, yes," she replied. "how did you know?" "Oh, lucky guess," said the doctor. "You have a sprained finger."

Blonde Joke #4: "Blonde Cruise"

A blonde walking by a travel agency notices a sign in the window, "Cruise Special - $99!" She goes inside, hands the agent her money, and says, "I'd like the $99 cruise special, please." The agent grabs her, drags her into the back room, ties her to a large inner tube, drags her out the back door and downhill to the river, pushes her in and leaves her, floating downstream. A few minutes later another blonde passes by, sees the sign, goes inside, and pays for the $99 cruise special. She receives the same treatment. Drifting into stronger current, she eventually catches up with the first blonde. As they float along, side-by-side, the first blonde asks, "Do they serve refreshments on this cruise?" The other replies, "They didn't last year!"

Blonde Joke #5: "Alligator Shoes"

A young blonde woman was driving through the Florida Everglades while on vacation. She wanted to take home a pair of genuine alligator shoes in the worst way, but was very reluctant to pay the high prices the local vendors were asking.

After becoming very frustrated with the attitude of one of the shopkeepers, the young blonde declared, "Well then, maybe I'll just go out and catch my own alligator and get a pair of shoes for free!"

The shopkeeper said with a sly smile, "Well little lady, why don't you go on and give it a try?"

The blonde headed off to the swamp, determined to catch an alligator.

Later in the day, as the shopkeeper is driving home, he spots the same young woman standing waist deep in the murky water, shotgun in hand.

As he brings his car to a stop, he sees a huge 9-foot gator swimming rapidly toward her. With lightning reflexes, the blonde takes aim, shoots the creature and hauls it up onto the slippery bank.

Nearby were 7 more dead gators, all lying belly up. The shopkeeper stood on the bank, watching in silent amazement. The blonde struggles mightily and manages to flip the gator onto its back. Rolling her eyes heavenward, she screams in frustration . .

"CRAP! THIS ONE'S BAREFOOT, TOO!"

Blonde Joke #6: "Trapped!"

A brunette, a redhead and a blonde were trapped in a burning building. Firemen arrived and spread out the blanket. "Jump! It's your only chance!" they cried. The brunette jumped and Swish! the firemen yanked the blanket away. The brunette smashed into the sidewalk. "Jump!" the firemen yelled to the redhead. "Oh, no!" the redhead cried. "You'll pull the blanket away!" "No, no! It's brunettes we can't stand! We love redheads!" "Well, okay," said the redhead, as she jumped. Swish! the firemen yanked the blanket away and she smashed into the sidewalk. Finally, it was the blonde's turn. "Jump!" yelled the firemen. "No way!" yelled the blonde. "You'll just pull the blanket away again!" "No, we won't. We won't pull the blanket away. We love blondes!" The blonde was adamant. "Nothing you say will convince me! Now put that blanket down and step away from it..."

Subversive Middle Age Behavior

Arrest me now. I may not be Arab, Muslim, or male but I do fit the profile of the two schmucks currently being much maligned by the FBI and the local papers for their "suspicious activities." You see, I once lived in a fundamentalist Muslim country and was married to a Palestinian. I grew up in a small southern town where the tallest building was the Merchants and Farmer's Bank and so I often stare up at the buildings in Seattle and any other large city I happen to be wandering.

I was a civil engineer in my previous career and find myself fascinated by bridges, viaducts, railroad bridges, locks, dams, and other key pieces of urban infrastructure. I sometimes go on line to study architectural drawings. I have even been known to photograph these critical pieces as well as churches, mosques, and even the airplanes on the tarmac at SEATAC. I live on an island and yet I am still fascinated by the roar of the engines and the speed of the water as it rushes beneath me on the ferry. I still take pictures of the skyline, the Colman Docks, the stern, the bow, the galley, and other urban places that interest me on the ferries that come and go from our bucolic little island port. I once took a picture of the cute little coast guard fellow on the ramp leading to the boat because he was just cute as hell in his battle dress.

There are more subversives in my family to arrest as well. Consider my son who is a commissioned officer in the US military currently training at a prestigious flight school sponsored by Uncle Sam. Seems to me he should be an object of great concern. Could he, an Irish/Cherokee/ Scottish/Arab American, be a deeply embedded covert Al Qaeda operative? Due to his deep-seated ancestral roots steeped in carnage and jihadist tribal behaviors could this red-blooded Arab American boy turn? Could he possibly be pre-programmed from infancy to ride his aircraft into a large building all in the name of Allah? Why else would he have gone to university to study to be an aviator? Why else would he have joined the military? He has to be a mole for Osama and the Boys!

How did the Arabs become the bad guys? When did we become so steeped in this new brand of ignorant isolationist bigotry? Islam, Muslim, Arab, Jihad. These words strike fear into the hearts of the ignorant masses of our country. FBI, CIA, Homeland Security, Patriot Act. These are the words that should strike fear in our hearts. They are the weapons of Mass Destruction. Being scared all the time and spying on my neighbors doesn't seem to be a real productive way to live one's life.

Less than a century ago some of the finest men in the world fought against this same oppressive behavior in places called Omaha, Utah, Gold, Juno, and Sword beaches along the coast of Normandy. Have we as a nation forgotten the nationalistic behaviors of the Germans as they sought to rid themselves of their Jewish population? Jews were different looking and accused of manipulating the world monetary institutions thus causing the great depression so they could profit and grow their ambitions.

The NAZI party was a small but vocal group that instituted a system to spy on and seek out subversives who were Jewish or Jewish-looking. Photos and drawings were circulated to help the common folks identify potential suspects. Watched, photographed, and finally the leadership, knowing what was best for the "real" Germans, instituted a plan to take care of their "Jewish threat." Their initial solution? Isolated "work camps" in other countries where Jews and non-conformist others (gays, lesbians, jazz musicians, gypsies, the mentally handicapped, and pacifist clergy to name a few) were sent for further interrogation and evaluation. This was all done in the best interest of the German people by their government.

I feel guilty as hell for all my subversive activities! Where do I turn myself in and to whom? The FBI? The Port Authority? Screw that! Send me the hotties from the Coast Guard!

Top 10 Characters In New Dallas Cowboys Fox Series

The Dallas Cowboys, coming off their crushing playoff loss to the New York Giants in the NFL Playoffs, have announced a prime-time series based on the team to be televised on Fox this off-season. Following is a list of the top 10 characters to be on this prime-time soap opera. The show, aptly named, "Unlikable People Creating Horrible Karma," is the centerpiece of the new Fox season.

#1-Tony Romo, character name "Jinx." Jinx will be known for his ability to melt down in various ways when times get tough. Slippery footballs, weekend trips to Mexico with Jessica Simpson and throwdowns with T.O. will all be part of the drama.

#2-Jessica Simpson, character name "Minx." Minx will throw the Cowboys chemistry upside down by dating Jinx, taking him to Mexico when the team needs him most, and causing all kinds of drama.

#3-T.O., character name "Diva 81." Diva 81 will bring 'da drama on a weekly basis. His needy, almost effeminate desire to be loved and adored will be felt from the first episode. His crying outbursts from Jinx dating hot pop stars and stealing headlines will be on full display. Wait, I mean crying outbursts from the team losing and him caring so much.

#4-Britney Spears, character name "What The Hell Happened?" What The Hell Happened will provide the attempted love triangle between her, Jinx and Minx. What the hell happened will be a former child star with a mess of issues.

#5-Bill Parcells, character name "Big Bill." Deep in the heart of Texas sits Jerry Jones' mortal enemy, Big Bill. Bill will be the competing football man that comes back to take revenge on Jerry Jones (or J.J. as he will be known) and the 'Boys.

#6-Jimmy Johnson, character name "Hair Guy." Hair Guy will be known as the old, lovable ex-coach that led the Cowboys to their past glory. His legendary sense of hair care sensibilities and hair care product knowledge will be focused on.

#7-Bill Belichick, character name "Homeless Coach." A mysterious, homeless-looking man who wears torn garments, Homeless Coach is befriended by Big Bill to run the competing team in town.

#8-Shaq, character name "The Big Guest Star." It wouldn't be drama without The Big Guest Star. Dallas will be rocked by The Big Guest Star, as the basketball phenom whose dream it is to be the best Punter in the world.

#9-Wade Philips, character name "No Playoff Wins." No Playoff Wins is the lovable Coach who couldn't shoot straight. His firing is coming, but until then, he will try his best to lead the Cowboys on the field.

#10-Jerry Jones, character name "J.J." The head honcho of the Dallas Cowboys, J.J., much like his predecessor, J.R., will run the show and be the law of the Cowboys. Big ego and small results lately have made J.J. quite ornery. Watch the sparks fly as he, Jinx, Diva 81 and company come your way this season on Fox.

We have learned that the finale of season one will center around, "Who Shot J.J." Everyone is a suspect, and no stone will be unturned when Dallas' big cheese goes down.

Count on Humor to Show Affection, Saving Face and Making Amends

"Seven, eight, nine, ten," muttered Larry.

Noticing that he was red faced and obviously agitated, I shot Larry a blank stare and asked, "What's going on?"

Exasperated, he filled me in, "Counting to ten!"

Clueless, I pushed on, "Why?" And then it dawned on me. My husband was perturbed...with me? The look on my face advertised my utter disbelief. Traditionally, Larry was the one who was dumbfounded to learn that he had ruffled my feathers. Chuckling at the irony of this moment, we both exploded into laughter.

Laughter devours frustration and defuses anger. It sets the tone and alters the mood in relationships. A sense of humor cushions our emotional response and enables us to let something slide, instead of taking offense or over-reacting. Humor allows us to save face when we blow it.

"Wow! You look nice."

My first impression of Larry's flattery was, "Nice? What happened to looking pretty, beautiful, or "hot?" Longing to enjoy our night out, and determined not to let anything put a damper on it, I whisked away my disparaging thoughts.

Larry picked up on my somber mood, flashed me a grin while arching his eyebrows, and continued to lay it on thick, "You look like you've lost weight."

Even though I had just performed a stretching routine after hopping into my favorite blue jeans so I could button them, I perked up, "I do?"

"Yes, your belly isn't sticking out nearly as much as... Larry's wide-eyed look of panic finished his sentence.

The ball dropped into my court. This was my chance to give my husband exactly what he had coming, "Was that remark supposed to resemble a compliment?" My stoic tone commanded his answer.

Looking down at his feet, Larry choked on his reply, "Yup. That was the plan." Playfully I teased, "I don't believe you meant to offend me, so I am going to give you a chance to make it up to me." His chin popped up. "After you spring for dinner, how would you like to take me to a movie of my choosing?"

Letting out a sigh of relief, Larry promptly recognized he had been had. I glowed triumphantly, because I succeeded in giving Larry what he deserved...the chance to save face. It was payback for those times he had disregarded my careless comments.

There's no better way to create closeness, than when someone demonstrates their love and acceptance of us, despite our shortcomings. So much, that they are willing to take the time and effort to convey our blunders back to us in a positive manner.

The next time someone unintentionally says or does something hurtful to you, refuse to take it personally. Call on your sense of humor to draw attention to their conduct without over-reacting. But don't let them off the hook without first having some fun. Surprise them by behaving completely opposite of how they would expect.

If you need to make amends for your actions, try using playful exaggeration and promise outrageous rewards in exchange for their forgiveness. Remember, on those days when you have misplaced your sense of humor, and don't want to lose your cool... you can always count to ten.

Lois McElravy, Lessons from Lois, works with individuals and organizations who want to learn how to effectively use humor, so they can handle the demands and pressures of work and home, maintain a flexible perspective, produce positive outcomes, and have more fun.

Learning to laugh and "hangin' on with humor" rescued Lois from the distress and despair surrounding her daily life, and initiated her recovery from a brain injury. Her universal message offers hope, motivates participants to be faithful to do the small things, and conquer their challenges one day at a time.

Greatest Artists and Songs

What would current musicians be without the foundation set by the legendary bands and classic artists that came before them?

Vivian Scott at Epic Records spoke the truth when she said that "There would be no new school without the old school". The status of "Legendary" and "Classic" when it comes to music is reserved for the best of the best. Even with thousands of bands with great music, there are always those that stand out from the rest.

If you want to discuss timeless music, Chuck Berry is one of the best places to start. Berry's hit song "Johnny B. Goode" in 1958 is so well known that I doubt any of you read the song title without singing it or hearing it play out in your head. This came from the same decade that brought you "Hound Dog" by the King himself, Elvis Presley, and "I Walk the Line" by Johnny Cash. But don't misinterpret this as age solely defines if a song is a classic. As new generations of music are ushered in, their best artists leave their mark as well. So move forward in time and you'll find: Aretha Franklin ready to teach you a little "Respect"; Van Morrison telling you what we use to sing in "Brown Eyed Girl"; and The Who, reminding you what this time period is all about with "My Generation".

With hundreds or maybe thousands of classic songs out there, no list could do justice to the these great bands. The fact that each decade has left behind it's own legends provides that generation the ability to interpret who should be on that list. Mash-ups and songs covered by newer artist prove the ability of the current generation's ability to represent the legends that inspired them. For example DJ Danger Mouse combined artist Jay-Z's "The Black Album "with The Beatle's "The White Album" to create The Grey Album; and you've probably turned the radio up as you heard the intro to Don Henley's "Boys of Summer" only to find out that it's a covered version by The Ataris.

But don't forget, many of these bands are still alive and some of them have continued producing music. You can always pick up Guitar Hero III and battle Slash from Guns N' Roses or look up tour dates for Metallica and Sting. In the music industry, it's possible to be a living legend. Just ask The Rolling Stones what it was like to rock out with the dinosaurs when you're at their next concert.

Music was once defined as the food of the soul.

Alltimemusichits.com is a web site that allows the various visitors to watch music videos and lyrics of their favorite songs.

The web site covers a large number of genres of music including rock (Red Hot Chili Peppers), metal, psychedelic rock (Pink Floyd), pop (Tina Turner), grunge (Nirvana) and various other artistes as well.

All time music hits is a site that is reserved for true lovers of music and is thus recommended to all true and genuine music lovers.

The Secret to Learn How to Play Guitar Fast

Learning how to play guitar doesn't have to be difficult, although some websites and instructors make it out that way. The time it takes you to learn is dependent on your expectations for what you want to play. If you want to be able to play top 40 songs you hear on the radio, and jam at parties with your friends then you can learn to play guitar fast, and that is what we're going to explore in this article.

Don't learn what isn't required

Don't spend time learning about theory and musical techniques if you aren't going to use them. Most private guitar lessons will start you learning the names of each string, then the notes on each string. This is very important for people who want to learn to play lead guitar, or plan on furthering their education. How ever if this isn't you don't spend time learning it.

If your main goal is to learn songs, play them well, and jam with other guitar players the technical aspect is probably something you won't ever use. If you want to learn how to play guitar fast you need to focus on the basics. Chord structure, strumming, and tablature reading.

Chords are the basis of every song, and thankfully are the easiest part of guitar to learn. Once you can play the basic major and minor chords you'll be amazed at just how easy most songs on the radio are to play.

Along with understanding what chords to play you must be able to duplicate the strumming patterns other bands use. This can take time, but practice makes perfect. Choose several songs to practice with after you've learned the chords progressions. You'll find that it becomes habit over time and as you master a few you'll be able to learn other songs more quickly.

Learn what you need to know about beginner guitar lessons at http://www.learnguitartoday.info a popular website that provide tips and guidance when selecting online guitar lessons.

Free Music Downloads for Ipod Touch, Nano and Iphone

There are free music downloads for all types of iPods which can be found right across the internet. Although like I have said in another article, iTunes is the best for quality even though it may be a bit more expensive then the others.

Currently I actually have nearly every IPOD there is out on the market. My little shuffle is great I use it when I am going for a run or down at the shops doing my grocery shopping at woolworths or coles. Iphone is just awesome to have, to be able to speak to people like there actually right near you is something to be amazed about. Also the other cool features make it easily the best phone in the world to have.

The classic IPOD to me is the best, as it was one of the first ones released. And I waited in line for over an hour for it to buy it around five minutes after it was officially released at my local retailer. As you can see I am probably one of the biggest apple and IPOD fans in the world. I possess like every product in the range of apple and I talk about it all the time. I listen to music through my apple products for around five hours a day and my hearing is still perfect, showing more about the quality of the products and how they do not damage the ears a lot. I am just really looking forward to the next product apple release, its going to be fantastic.

Visit Free IPOD Music and Movie Downloads! Free IPOD Music and Movie Downloads is a must see for all IPOD and apple fans.

Poetic Epigrams for February, 2008

Plato and Aristotle (Haiku)

Two geniuses together

makes for two lit pieces of dynamite

#2167 1-22-2008

Friendship Chosen

I don't care to be everyone's friend:
there is too much wickedness
in human nature
and I don't have eight eyes
that circle my head...

In most cases, friendships
sink to the bottom of the sea
because they are too heavy
to carry (and it involves equality).

#2168 1-22-2008

Revolution (Haiku)

There is always a negative fraction
to every revolution,

even if it achieves some good

#2169 1-22-2008

Attractiveness (Haiku)

When we become molded
like the other, the
attractiveness leaves-;

be/ing

different is attractiveness

#2170 1-22-2008

Evil vs. Good (A Prophetic Stance)

Where does evil fit in?
There are opposing energies here:
between Good and Evil!
Plato and Ginsberg, both looked at
its connection; in particular,
their duality's fight for acceptance.
Socrates, claimed:
break the other's definitions
(right or wrong):
you win.

#2168 1-21-2008

Happiness

In most cases
we are good because
we want to be happy

(happiness being a byproduct)

#2171 1-20-2008

Charm and Greed (Haiku)

It is easy to display charm not greed,
when you have freedom from care.

#2172 1-20-2008)

Elements of Friendship

Friendship requires equality
duration, stability-but be
careful with gratitude, it throws
rocks in the way,
then it is based on kindness.

#2173 1-20-2008

Top Tips To Help You Pass Your Driving Test

Does This Sound Like You?

I passed my theory test with no problems but the practical test I must say I am totally dreading! The thing is with me I am very hard on myself and if I make a little mistake it seems to affect me more than it should. I think it's because I have always done well at things like exams/degree/work and I strive for perfection and I keep thinking why can't I learn to drive like everyone else! It's taken me more lessons than 'average' to get to the stage which my instructor says I'm ready for the test.

It Is Very Rare That A Pupil Is Not Nervous - You Are Not Alone.

When thinking about your test or actually doing it, bare this in mind:

- Should you fail, it is NOT the end of the world.

- Don't worry about the test - I am sure that you could think of a lot better and more important things to worry about.

- It is just another 'drive' - only difference is that there is someone else sitting there telling you where to go.

- It is nice to be perfect but it is not required. If you do make a mistake - get over it, move on. If you try and assess it on your drive, you will make more mistakes. The mistake may not be as serious as you think! Let the examiner worry about it - not you.

- 3 to 4 minutes into the test, you WILL have settled in and the nerves gone.

- The examiners are only people, just like you and are nothing special. They are NOT out to fail you or to make you feel they are superior - they are not.

- Look at all the idiots in the road - they passed the test!

- Try to think of yourself as a 'Driver' rather than a learner. After all that is likely what you will be 40 minutes after the start of your test.

Find more information on driving lessons, driving instructors and driving schools at the Driving Schools Directory

How to Get the Best Limousine Service Out of Your Money

Limousine is derived from the French word Limousin. A limousine is a long luxury card which is traditionally comes in black and white. But nowadays, there are also other colors that are being offered such as pink, magenta and blue.

Typically, limousines are being driven by chauffeurs and associated with the wealthy. But these days, there are limousine services that are affordable, so anyone can rent or hire a limousine service for their special occasions. If you have special occasion, you definitely want it to be perfect and memorable. So you want to have the best rate, service and limo out of your money. Continue reading this article to gain tips on how to rent the best limousine service.

Before looking for limousine service, you have to consider the type of event that you are planning. Usually, limo companies charge customers based on the type of events. There are several events that limo companies cater such as weddings, birthdays, prom nights, nights out, airport transfers, concerts, transfers from a to b, business meetings and special events.

Prepare and list down all the things that you are looking for. You have to decide how many hours you need for your special event. Determine the numbers of people who will ride with you in the limo since this is important in finding the right type of limo you need. The net thing you should do is to decide which type you need. There are different types of limos that are available for you such as Sedans, 6 passenger limos, 8 passenger limos, 10 passenger limos, 12 passenger limos, SUV, Hummer, and so on.

For you to have the limo that you want and need, reserve early. Call few weeks or months in advance for reservation. Now, before you make any reservation with a particular limo company, you have to do some research first. Use the internet in searching for few limo companies and compare.

Lists some limo companies and contact each. Listen on how they respond to your requests and questions. In doing this, you can also find the one you is reliable one and give attentions to their customers. If is better to call each companies on the lists and ask for rates which includes gratuity, cancellation fees, how much for an extra hour and the likes. After gaining information, decide which limo company that you think will be on time and can give you best rate, service and limo and of course with the best chauffeur. Book with the limo company you choose.

When booking for a limousine service, make sure to let the company put everything in writing. Before signing, read all the details written on the contract, make sure it is precise and accurate. Ask for a copy of contract.

Before your special event, about 2 to 3 days, you have to call the limo company to confirm your reservation. It is better to ask for the chauffeur's cell phone number. Take time to know if the limo company knows all the details needed for your event. In doing all of these, you are assuring yourself to have a perfect special event.

Theatre Marketing Ideas

Marketing and promotions in the performing arts for your theatre is often plagued with problems, the public does not always pay attention to such tactics, and marketing in the arts will compete with other forms of entertainment. So when a marketing program is started one should move carefully, testing different methods before committing serious money. I have met people who have already spent many thousands of dollars on some campaigns without a single conversion. They should have spent some to determine the value of the campaign before committing most of their budget to it.

It is of course difficult to market the theater with only a small amount of money or to gauge impacts on such amounts. Even so you must look for ways to work within and build up to the budget you have so that you do not sink it on a useless strategy. The following are some basic ideas and thoughts on marketing the performing arts including possible internet methods.

Theatre is about connection, connection with the audience. That is the difference between theater and film connection. This is the way for a theatre to build audience as will, through a connection with their community, with the people who may potentially watch your plays, to make them the audience.

In one small town this connection was established with existing audience members through a simple hand shake. At the end of each play the actors, and other play participants would come out by the doors and shake hand with audience members who passed by them on the way out. While obviously not possible to a full extent in a large theater, many small theatres could benefit from this tactic. For in this simple act the audience is able to see and connect on a personal level with those who created the performance they just watched. If they did not like the performance initially this interaction is more likely to help them forgive the performers, and so will help the theatre avoid bad PR and word of mouth. This action can also lead those that did like or think the performance was ok to like it more, for we all like performances more when we know the people involved. In this respect this action is especially useful in marketing future theater events, for in that hand shake and a few words with the actor or actress whose performance a person liked, the actor or actress becomes more implanted in their mind and memory. That way if they are on a poster in the future, or on current posters which the person sees with their friends, the person is more likely point the play and the performance out to friends and potential audience members.

Another method of connecting with the local community is by going to assist or speak to high schools, and colleges in your area. By benefiting students, teachers, and contributing to the overall education of a community you have the opportunity to get in the paper, get talked about by teachers, and students in your community. Should there be enough interest you could hold workshops with members of the local community, on acting and directing. Such things help to provide a more supporting base which in turn will help to provide a larger and more consistent audience. For the primary method of marketing of most small theaters, or at least the best one is through word of mouth, so the most important thing you can do is get people to talk positively about your theater.

Great Tips for Buying Adult Tap Shoes

Tap dancing can be a great way to stay in shape and make social connections while doing something you enjoy. It also offers an excellent opportunity for adults who want to learn a new style of dance but aren't ready for the demands that styles like ballet put on you. One of the most important necessities for your tap dancing lessons is of course the tap shoes themselves. As an adult, buying tap shoes is slightly different than buying an ordinary pair of shoes or sneaker. There are several things you should know before you buy to make sure you end up with a pair that works for you. These tips can help you purchase a pair of tap shoes that will meet your needs.

• Quality is Important: There are several points in your life where you can definitely sacrifice quality for quantity but this is not one. Tap dancing is all about the feet and therefore, a pair of less than quality shoes can make it harder to learn and leave your feet begging for a break. If you are really serious in your pursuit of this new hobby, cheap shoes can make it incredibly hard to progress. On the other hand, quality tap shoes will offer you the support you need which will ultimately help you perfect moves. If this is something you are really interested in spend the few extra dollars and spring for a good pair.
• Buy According to Your Skill Level: Much like other forms of dance like ballet or street dancing, jazz has different shoes that work to meet the needs of different level dancers. When looking for tap shoes look for pairs that are made specifically for beginners. The most common pair used by beginning tappers are a lace up pairs with little or no heal. Tap shoes with heels or ones with an additional tap or jingle taps should be left to advanced dancer. These shoes can make it hard to achieve the sound you want or to learn the move you need to and therefore can be particularly frustrating for beginners.
• Consider Adjustable Taps: If you have a knack for picking things up rather quickly, you may want to consider buying a pair of shoes with adjustable taps. These taps can be moved and adjusted to perfect your sound as it changes. These can also be great for beginners since they offer the ability to move the tap to fit your particular needs.
• When Shopping Online do Your Homework: In today's e commerce society, shopping online has be come a normal way to make purchases. If you plan on buying your taps online make sure you do a little research first. Ask your instructor or fellow dancers for advice and tips. Check various dance blogs and forums and read shoe reviews. This will help you make an educated decision about your purchase. Once you reach the website you plan to buy your shoes from, be sure to read the descriptions and the sizing chart to make sure you buy shoes that fit and meet your needs.

For all your dancing needs visit Just for Kix. Just for Kix is your one stop shop for dance wear. Just for Kix offers quality cheerwear and dancewear at affordable prices.

Humor in Indian Marriages

Humor in Indian marriages is rampantly palpable, but somewhat not quite palatable.

The protagonist of the story is the girl's father. If blessed with more than one girl child, he is utterly condemned. Girls are considered to be liabilities and so, he is always on the defensive. He is on a constant lookout for good matches. If a suitable match is found he has to go to the boy's house and make the proposal. He remains at the receiving end of the ensuing negotiations and bargaining once the proposal is approved. The antagonist of the story is the boy's father. He is an aggressor and sits at home right royally with tremendous assets called boys. He considers the proposals with an investor's eye and approves only if it promises maximum benefits. Assets must attract more assets.

The natural 'boy meets girl' formula is rarely followed. Instead, the time tested formula is 'horoscope meets horoscope'. The protagonist goes to the antagonist's house with a copy of the girl's horoscope and her photo. He deposits the credentials there with high hopes. He is lucky if he is served tea and snacks. If the boy reacts favorably to the photo the antagonist then, at his own sweet time, calls for the family priest and asks for examination of the girl's horoscope with the boy's. If the priest declares a good match then the antagonist posts a letter announcing the results putting the burden of all the follow-ups on his counterpart. If not, the antagonist does not think it proper to answer at all.

Following an approved proposal the girl's father goes to the boy's house again and invites them formally to 'see' the girl. The boy's family lands up there on the appointed day and a lavish reception is always arranged for them. On mutual agreement the boy and the girl are allowed to have a private meeting to discover each other.

In many other cases the engaged ones never get the opportunity to meet each other. They land up on the nuptial bed as perfect strangers. Well ...

In the lower or lower middle class homes of the overcrowded cities there is hardly any space for the new couple. There are already couples galore in such one room tenements. They range from the grand-parental level to even the grand-son level. So, the new couple has to go to the parks or the rocky beaches in search of a little romancing. But sometimes the humorless cops spoil it further by raiding such spots and locking up even legitimate couples.

Meanwhile, the father of the bride gets happy with the thought that some of his liabilities are settled now. That is the only good feeling he can afford. He is not supposed to visit his child often and accept hospitality there, though he more often than not fully sponsored the boy's reception party. In some still less fortunate cases he has to carry on the bargaining game at his cost. The antagonist reasons with him, 'Look man! Whatever you are giving you are giving only to your dearest little daughter. Don't you want to see her happy!'

It is said that Indian marriages are made in heaven and it is the union of the souls. It is neither a contract nor a biological settlement. It is holy permanent and eternal.

Oh Lord, where are the souls gone?

***

Hey Teacher, Leave Them Monkeys Alone

For the last month monkeys have again ravaged the city of New Delhi in India. For years monkeys have made the news in that city, where urban development has quickly overrun much of the monkey's natural environment. Recent events elevated when a group of monkeys tussled with the deputy mayor of New Delhi on his balcony, causing the civil servant to fall, suffering head wounds that resulted in the politicians death a day later. Although active campaigns have been conducted by the city to remove the displaced animals, none have implemented with a clear indication of effectiveness.

The primary method enacted by the city has been to pay trappers for each monkey captured and relocated to a rural sanctuary. However, some speculate this separates monkeys from their families, leaving the ones who remain isolated, angry, and more likely to attack humans. In light of recent attacks on humans, including attempted kidnappings of infants, the next method may seem like a bad idea; that is the method of releasing larger, more frightening monkeys to scare off the ones who are already attacking humans. Despite that creative effort, the city still struggles in its predicament, with neither method remaining effective.

An average American might make an easy solution by discreetly ridding their city of the pests by hiring a "professional." You know the type, the John Goodman from the film Arachnophobia, someone with a nasty can of chemicals and enough tobacco spit to cover the city street corners with poison while setting bait traps. However, many of the human residents in New Delhi remain devout Hindus, and revere the monkeys as a manifestation of the monkey god Hanuman. So killing them is out of the question. Another idea might be forms of birth control, keeping the monkey population low while the older generation dies out. (the Rhesus macaques have an average of a 15 year lifespan in the wild).

However, these types of monkeys are known for their disdain of condom usage (it just doesn't feel natural) and their unabashed love of Barry White albums.

So, what is a modern city infested by Old World monkeys supposed to do? As politicians and scientists scramble for a solution, the monkeys continue to wreak havoc throughout Delhi, snatching candy from children, crowding the streets while begging pedestrians for peanuts, and leaving annoying fliers under the windshield wipers of parked vehicles to promote unknown bands. Many alternative solutions have been applied before when citizens faced this kind of an infestation. There is the story of the pied piper, who removed the rats from a terrorized town by playing Jethro Tull flute solos over and over. In the Tim Burton film, Mars Attacks, Martians were defeated by Slim Whitman yodeling the old operetta solo "Indian Love Call." For decades, droves of drunken wedding reception participants have been entranced and led around a room by the mystical leader of the conga line.

These past solutions pose a question. Does novelty music contain a magical quality to mesmerize the animals invading Delhi? Or does it simply take a Monkee to fight a monkey? Let's hope for New Delhi's sake, that Davey Jones, Michael Nesmith, Peter Tork, and Micky Dolenz are up to the task.

www.thearmchairworldexplorer.com

Answering, What Is The Perfume Hoax?

To answer what is the perfume hoax, we need to understand that a hoax is a misleading trick to con naive individuals and groups into believing something that is not true or a ruse. Hoaxes can be anything between a good-hearted practical joke out and out and out right scandalous swindle. To hoax is to deceive.

The perfume hoax comes by various ways, such as online emails that make the rounds from time to time telling about some poor soul who is exiting some type of business, such as department stores and gas stations. You will find that these types of hoaxes seem to change the location and the name of the place where the so-called perfume hoax takes place. These usually involve a story about a person being approached by an individual or a group who ask them what perfume they are wearing and try to sell them bogus perfumes. Alternatively, they may have them sniff a perfume and then the target person becoming unconscious by smelling what is in the perfume bottle or sample, only to awaken to find them robbed or raped.

A hoax that may tell as a story about people dying when sniffing sample perfume they receive in the mail, while planting the idea in the readers head that this is yet another act of terrorism. Yet, there are no such reported deaths by samples.

These jokes are total misinformation and sometimes right out lies by the person who began any particular perfume joke. Some people will tell you they heard this story by email, radio, television and by word of mouth. Most of the time, they try to sound sincere by being kind enough to forward these spoofs so that they save you from the same misfortune they or someone they know has experience in a perfume hoax. Generally, they will also ask your to forward the so-called story to others you know, as this will increase the probability of being believable by gullible people.

The perfume hoax grows to be the same kind of story, however its structure may change such as becoming a testimonial of someone narrowly missing misfortune because they did receive a warning email just in time to keep them from disaster and they want to save you. These types of hoaxes do their best to set up a scare tactic in anyone who may read and believe it. Some of them can be very detailed which adds to being more realistic and creditable.

Anytime you receive information such as the perfume hoax, you can search online to find out if it is a hoax or not. Although, it is good to be alert to the fact of approaching strangers, not everyone is out to harm you. To break the effects of the chain of a hoax you should never assume them true.

Find your favorite perfume at discount and wholesale perfume dealers online or locally.

How to Talk to a Car Salesman

Just recently I have had the pleasure to spend time shopping for a new car. Not having done this in six years I basically didn't know where to start. There are so many options to choose from. Compact cars, mid-size sedans, luxury cars, wagons. etc.

After much thought, I compared my current car's engine specifications and my cars dimensions to new cars and made a list. Time to test drive. This was an adventure to say the least. I would categorize myself as an aggressive test driver. Something I found that my car salesmen and saleswoman didn't appreciate.

My current car has provided me with quite an education in car repairs. It was my intention on my test drives to try out all the features and put the car to the test. Being that I have quite a sense of humor, it humored me to no end, that on ever single test drive I took the salespeople were the ones to start the car from a cold start. Having experienced problems with my current car and cold starts I thought it wise to question this behavior. I heard a variety of answers. "I need to back it out of the parking space" or "I need to drive it off the lot for safety's sake". This is what confuses me. If I am taking a car for a test drive, wouldn't I know how to back it out of a parking spot and drive it?

The test drive I must say was rather interesting. It apparently throws some sales men for a loop when you ask about engine specifications. The funny thing is I repeated what I had read and learned from their car literature. It was also quite interesting how many of the salesmen new how to work the cruise control. In my case it was none.

The really fun part is what happens after the test drive. You both sit down across from each other at a desk and do what is called: "working up some figures". This in layman's terms is paying the most for the new car and getting extremely little for your old car. Sounds like fun, doesn't it? The best part is when the mystery voice is called in. A call is made to this mystery voice where you learn exactly how little you are going to get for you old car.

The most impressive thing was when I was asked by a salesman: "See these figures." "How can we make you part of our family and feel comfortable about your purchase today?" I am not one to make snap decisions let alone make a purchase on the spot. So after thinking to myself I said: "Isn't selling a car something you want to do?" "You can call me when you come down in price." That reply of course brought stares. I in turn excused myself and left. Two days later I got a call from the salesman requesting I come in again and "work the figures".

Lorraine likes to find the humor in things we hear everyday and tend to ignore. Visit Lorraine's web site at: http://lorrainemessina.com to read her funny articles and to purchase her humor products.

Art Miniature Painting On Lacquered Caskets

Summarized briefly, miniature painting is a form of painting that is deeply rooted in many cultures and spans centuries. Miniature painting is a traditional style of art that is very detailed, often referred to as painting or working "in miniature". Because of their origins as illuminations, they are also painted to have as smooth of a surface as possible.

In spite of the fact that the church demanded to fulfill precisely every element of icon, Palekh artists did it in their own manner of writing faces, figures, elements of landscape, buildings, carriages and so on. On the icons you could see some domestic details such as furniture, clothes, arms, horse harness. Some of them have been kept in todays Palekh miniature art painting somewhat changed creatively.

Palekh painting wasn't born accidentally. It was a result of century-old traditions in new historical conditions based on the knowledge of icon-painting handicraft of many generations. Their methods were rich and varied. From the very beginning Palekh artists had been studying and keeping old Russian art traditions. Therefore at an icon and a product executed in the spirit of palekh miniature have much common. After the 1917 Revolution, when the icon business went into the deepest of declines, Palekh masters tried their hands at decorating art wood tableware, kitchen utensils, toys, dishes, porcelain and glass. As it turned out, the most interesting way was the painting of paper-mache boxes that became the black-lacquered miniature.

The varnish miniature is executed by tempera paint on a papier-mache. Colour of palekh painting is based on a combination of three colours - red, yellow and green. The Palekh miniatures usually represent characters from real life, literary works, fairy tales, bylinas, and songs. They are painted with local bright paints over the black background and are known for their delicate and smooth design, abundance of golden shading, and accurate silhouettes of flattened figures, which often cover the surface of the lids and sides of the articles completely. Poetic magic of the Palekh characters, decorativeness of landscapes and architecture, and elongated proportions of the figures go back to the icon-painting traditions. The miniatures are usually set off with a complicated pattern made with gold dissolved in aqua regia.

Palekh lacquered miniatures are painted on articles - caskets and boxes, brooches and hairpins for ties, a panel and ashtrays and great number of other little things made of papier-mache. The process of making Palekh articles is the following: The first operation in the making of these gems of folk art is the cutting out of the cardboard. The strips of cardboard are covered with flour paste, placed on circular or rectangular moulds and pressed. After that the material is given a coating of warm linseed oil. The carefully checked pieces are handed to the joiners. Then the undercoat is applied to the article with a steel palette knife. The outside of Palekh articles is painted with black lacquer. The inside is painted with red lacquer. The final operation before painting: about seven coats of transparent oil varnish is applied to the outside and inside of the article. Every coat applied is dried in the furnace for 9 hours at 90°C.

The articles are now ready to be handed to the artists. The work of the artist begins with preparation of the paint. In Palekh the paints are mixed with egg emulsion. The yolk, separated from the white, is returned to the shell where a mixture of water and vinegar is added. Then the emulsion is stirred with a special brush. Before painting the article, the artist draws on the design. Then the composition is outlined in white lead with a very fine squirrel brush and the colours are then applied in strict succession. The work of the miniature painter requires not only creative inspiration, but also extreme care and precision which is why Palekh painters frequently make use of a magnifying glass. When the painting is over, the artist begins the gold work. The gold must be polished to give it the necessary shine. After having signed the article the artist coats it by transparent oil varnish and polish by hand.

The village of Palekh is situated in 65 km to the east from Ivanovo town on the bank of the Paleshka-river, which flows among the hills covered by leaf-bearing forests. In the 15th century it was a part of the Vladimir Susdal lands and was one of the first ancient centers of the icon art. In the 17th and 18th centuries Palekh's craftsmen rose to become the most famous in all of icon art. They developed a unique style identifiably distinguished by the fine line tempera drawing saturated with gold of their own. These art works were valued for the depth of the images, the subtlety of color placement, their intricate and minute attention to detail as much as for their fairy-tale-like ornamental design. Palekh artists are universally regarded as the most highly trained of the Russian miniature painters. The discipline and masterful technique of the ancient art of icon painting is readily seen in works of the various artists. It is amazing that what started out as a true folk tradition over hundreds years ago is still thriving and remains basically true to its roots, albeit on a more organized scale.

The Changing Art Market

The art market has gone through some changes of late. The artists who always commanded a high price have since cooled. I wish I could put my finger on the exact reason why but I can't. Maybe people are waking up and seeing that some of the art thought to be a worthy investment just isn't. I guess if we all knew the answer to that we would all be wealthy!

The market is beginning to see a new era of interest in who and what. Though we all want beautiful art adorning our walls, most of us can't afford it. So what is the answer? Are the old masters still in demand? The answer is a resounding yes! The market has changed directions a little but the masters still command an unreal price. But who can afford them? With its' changes comes a new group of artists.

What should art collectors look for? I always look for what is appealing to me, whether I understand it or not, each piece has it's own personality. I try to find that trait in the work. The prices one should pay for a nice piece is strictly up to each collector. With prices being down right now it is a buyers market. Remember that when you are looking at investing in a piece of art make sure is means something to you, or, that you can live with your decision before you shell out for it.

The galleries are the price hikers here. Most of the time artists are glad to sell art, for any price! Just think, all artists at one time were unknown, even Rembrandt. The masters struggled just as hard then as they do today. How much value is placed on talent? If you see a piece of art that appeals to you, buy it! If you just like a piece, BUY IT! Unless you have a bottomless pocketbook chances are you won't be able to buy art from a master anyway.

I've noticed of late the auctions selling art on TV are ridiculous. Would you really think you can buy a signed Picasso for $350! I stay away because I listen to them describe them. Most can't even pronounce the name of the artist. Very few have research on what they are selling yet that does not seem to matter. They can make a good feeling turn sour real quick. These are the places you should be very, very aware of!

In conclusion, buy what you can afford. If you can afford a work of art from a master, buy it and pass it on down through your family. If you are like me, buy the art because of how it makes you feel. After all, isn't that what an artist does?

Color Your Dragon

An interesting facet of the dragon world is that the color of the dragon represents the type, personality and symbolism of each dragon. The main colors are red, blue, green, purple, silver, bronze, black, white and gold.

For instance, the color purple has long been associated with royalty in our world and it is so with the purple dragons. They place themselves above others, as does royalty. On the other hand they try to please others and maybe this is why 'Puff The Magic Dragon" was purple. Who knows?

Red. Now this color is highly symbolic of passion and love, strong emotions; and red oftentimes represents blood and fire which can be fearsome events. So the red dragon is very high on the totem pole of dragons. It is not surprising that the red dragons would be the ones which spew fire.

Blue dragons reflect what the color represents; coldness and a sullen personality trait. Water and ice are associated with the color blue. These dragons are really quite calm and peaceful unless they are of the sea. The blue sea serpents are the bane of the ships on the sea and a great danger to all.

Mean and evil and they represent chaos. How appropriate that these dragons are black. Black is the color of evil as we all know. The people who live near to the black dragons hate them fiercely because they are deceptive and only out for themselves.

You would expect white dragons would be the opposite of the black dragons. After all, they are extremely wise and righteous, but are they really? Well, not totally it seems, because they never quite tell the entire truth, always holding back a little. So, they are somewhat evil themselves.

When we think of the earth, we most often associate the color green with it. Green dragons are symbolic ot the earth, vegetation and nature in general. They rule over nature and all of its forces, good and bad; earhquakes, all growth and all changes on the earth. These are the acid spitters and the people eaters!

In the hierarchy of dragondom, gold dragons are the royals, the kings and queens over all. The ones who are the royals are good and fair to all, but this is not so for the others. If they are not kings or queens, the gold dragons are greedy and hoard all sorts of treasures in gold and jewels.

These are the main colors of dragons although there are other more minor ones. it should be noted here that most of what I have covered in this article has been about the Western dragons. The Eastern dragons of the same colors can have quite different personalities and traits as their Western counterparts of the same color.

As discussed in "What's Your Dragon" the Eastern dragons are more serene and more revered than the Western dragons.

Well, back to the reading board...not done yet. Dragon lore has got me hooked!

This whole world of dragons is even bigger than I first thought when I began reading about them (see my EZine articles "Dragons or Dinosaurs - What Does History Tell Us?" and "What's Your Dragon").

What to Look For in Monumental Sculpture

Monumental sculpture is exceptionally large sculpture. It is called "monumental" because monuments are often large sculptures. But such sculptures are not just monuments. Any large public sculpture, or any large sculpture, for that matter, is monumental. What should you look for? It should be sturdy and long-lasting. It should have a powerful presence. It should be the product of a big idea. Last but by no means least, it should be safe. I will review these criteria.

A public sculpture has to be a lot sturdier and a lot more structurally sound than a sculpture that goes in someone's backyard. The collector who buys art for the home or outdoor landscape would hope his purchase was as structurally sound and sturdy, but it rarely is. One should not be too upset about this. Public sculpture has to be exceptionally sturdy. The sculptor who attains public placement usually has a level of professionalism that recognizes the demands of public sculpture, demands that are different from backyard and garden sculpture.

Generally, the bigger the sculpture, the more structurally sound it has to be. If the sculpture is bigger than human-size, it moves out of the realm of that which the private art collector would buy and deeper into the realm of public sculpture. Thus, sculptors who regularly produce large, monumental pieces - anything over six feet tall or wide - tend to produce very sturdy pieces. Sculptors who regularly produce small work - anything less than four feet high - tend to have much less concern about structure and sturdiness. This may seem obvious, but it is something to remember when commissioning large pieces.

Aside from structural integrity, monumental sculpture offers, or should offer qualities that do, as it happens, reflect the title "monumental". Large sculpture should stand out. It should have a powerful presence. It doesn't necessarily have to leap out at you as a billboard would. Rather, it should have a powerful presence that does not have to leap out at you like an advertisement. The sculpture should give the viewer the feeling "Ah, here's something." The sculpture should capture your attention with its powerful presence. It should evoke awe and wonder - as well as any other emotions.

Big sculpture must present the "big idea". So if you were to say, "What's the big idea?" And someone pointed to the sculpture and said "That is, over there." You would have to agree, "Yeah, I guess you're right. That is a big idea." Some ideas should not be big: They should not be presented in large work. That does not mean the idea is any less worthy. It's just not a big idea...yet, anyway.

A sculptor need not come up with lots of big ideas. He might come up with one big idea and work that idea for years, perhaps a lifetime. Another artist might be comfortable working out little ideas, one and then another. Neither artist is better. The little idea artist should not, however, be making large, monumental sculpture: not unless he's found a big idea, or melded all the little ideas into a big one.

The last criterion for monumental sculpture one is pragmatic - and important, prosaic as that criterion might be: large sculpture has to be safe. Such sculpture is often made of metal. If it is not made of metal, it can be made of stone or concrete. The point here: Most materials a large sculpture can be made of are not soft. Therefore, they should not have any uncommonly sharp edges. For sure you expect a public work to be devoid of that. But the private sculpture also has to be safe. We, the general public, assume the sculpture is safe whether it is or is not. Thus, the creator of large sculptures has to take safety into account. If the work has a patina, is it safe to handle the work? Have any excess chemicals been washed off? Can the sculpture poke someone in the eye? Is it possible to walk into the sculpture and hurt oneself? And so on.

The private collector should think about this. He is not as protected as the buyer for public work. The buyer for public work is going to think about safety. The residential buyer, not necessarily. But he should.

Start Your Art Collection Today!

Since the beginning of time, art has played an important part in human history. Art differentiates us from all other living things. From the caves of early humans to the lofts of today's urban singles, the common element is art.

Many believe that owning good art is beyond their means, so they settle for mass produced items that are nothing more than wall paper. The good news is: good art is within your reach. You just have to seek it out. You can start your art collection today!

Where do you begin?

The first criterion for buying art is that you love the art you buy. Sounds crazy, but many people buy art they do not like because they think it has good investment value. Unless you are a wheeler dealer who buys very expensive art, the value of your art is probably more important to those who will inherit your belongings once you have passed from this world. While you are in this world, collect art that you LOVE!

I have an original pastel of a Rocky Mountain scene that I purchased from the artist 20 years ago for $80. It seemed like a lot of money at the time, but I can tell you it has given me a million dollars worth of pleasure. Every day I look at it, I am transported for the moment into that scene. It is like taking a mini-vacation. That is the return on your investment you get when you love the art you buy.

Having said all this, understand that the art you buy can increase in value. It just makes more sense to buy good art that you love. If it appreciates in value all the better.

Where do you look?

Almost every area has art fairs during the spring, summer and fall. Art fairs provide you with an opportunity to see a lot of great art. You also get a chance to meet the artist face to face. When I like a piece of art, I spend a good deal of time talking to the artist before I buy. Taking the time to do so gives you an insight into the creative process the artist used to create the art you buy. Long after you purchase your art you will think back to that discussion and it will make the piece of art that much more personal to you.

Owning a Picasso would be great, but imagine how much more meaningful it would be if you bought it directly from Picasso and had a chance to talk to him about his creative process.

Art can also be found online. You can view a lot of original art in a short period of time by visiting the websites of artists online. You can find artist websites by doing a search on Yahoo or Google. If you have a particular medium that interests you, simply do a search on "watercolor artists" or "Photographers". This will give you a whole list of sites to visit. Take your time and look at a lot of sites. Bookmark those sites that have art that holds your interest. You can go back to these sites and decide if you want to purchase any of the art that is available.

Granted, you may lose the personal nature of buying direct at an art fair, but you have the ability to find some beautiful works of art at affordable prices. Artist's sites usually have a great deal of information about the art work, artist and their creative process. You can get to know the artist better by reading their "Artist Statement". This will give you a great deal of insight into the artist's mind, creative process and craft. In the long term, you may find that you do develop an ongoing connection to artists you find online. New works of art are premiered on their site as they become available.

Art is very personal. Art that touches you, may not touch me. The art you collect is a reflection on those things that are meaningful to you. Art gives us hope, it gives us pleasure. Art gives us escape from the tensions of the day, it heals us. When you collect art, you begin a personal adventure that fills your home with beauty and gives joy to your soul. You may not be able to afford a Picasso, but you certainly can afford a Thomas Dean. Start your art collection today!

Stretch Fine Art Canvas Prints For Greater Profit

Most wide format printers have the ability to print on canvas. Many photographers and artist are realizing the novelty and profitability of printing art on canvas. The truth of the mater is this. There are greater profit margins for printing on canvas than photo or art papers. There are a number of reasons for this, one of those being that you can produce a framed stretched museum grade art print for less than you can produce a framed photo with mat and glass of the same size.

Yes that has been my professional experience. The reason why many photographers do not print on canvas is because they do not know how to stretch it. What they do know is that a frame shop will charge a substantial amount for this service. On the other hand many know how to find an inexpensive frame mate and glass kit to create a final product with photo or art paper in there office or garage. Still I say that if they only knew how to stretch canvas, they could create a product with a greater profit margin potential.

Another tip about increasing profit margin when it comes to canvas is this. If your gallery wraps your canvas, then your canvas can be hung on a wall without a frame and still be considered a finished product. So in other words, you will be able on occasion, to sell your canvas art prints without a frame for a comparable price. Gallery wrapped means the image on the canvas goes from the surface of the image to the sides of the image all the way to the back of the image. Basically the picture wraps.

Now there are a few things to consider that are very important when it comes to stretching fine art canvas and those considerations are the materials you choose. Canvas, sealer and stretcher bar. We will talk about them in that order. When selecting a canvas its imaging properties need to be superb. I have found mate canvas to be superior to gloss or semi gloss canvas when it comes to imaging. Mate canvas calls for mate black ink in you printer. When you stretch your canvas it should not crack on the edges. One of the things that can help in this regard is a good sealer. When sealer adheres to the printing surface it causes the canvas to be more malleable. A good canvas coupled with a good sealer will result in absolutely no cracking. Stretcher bar needs to have a raised lip so as to prevent ghosting. It also needs to be sturdy.

Now I now that all of this may seem like a bit of a learning curve. It is. The good news is, that you don't have to go through it by means of trial and error until you master it.

At http://www.zazagallery.com on the product info page you will find a picture demonstration of how to stretch a canvas from beginning to end accompanied by instructions. This site is very resourceful if your looking to print on canvas. At this point in my career I print exclusively on canvas. The encouragement that I can give to those who are considering fine art canvas printing is, the payoff far out-ways the investment. For any of you out there that would like some feedback from someone who is doing it please visit the contact page of my website.

ZaZaGallery. Our art is the buss in our community. Our fine art prints are gallery wrapped using the finest canvas and inks to create a museum grade art piece.Our product is unique so join the buss and visit us by clicking stretcher bar Thank you, Hugh Parker.